my son will never...

A funny (I promise) insight into the world of being a wife, mom and teacher. Every day when I leave my job as a high school teacher, I think of all of the things my own precious son will never do when he is a teenager. I've decided to write it all down, just to make sure...

Thursday, June 01, 2006

AP Biology


Sometimes I compare my kid with other kids. I know. You're not supposed to do that. They all develop at their own rate blah blah blah. But as a mom and a teacher, you wonder what kind of teenager your own kid will turn out to be. Gus is almost 9 months old now and he doesn't crawl. No. Not even "doesn't crawl." He doesn't even PRETEND to be interested in learning how to crawl. So of course I automatically think that he will be in special ed. I teach special ed. At least I will be equipped to help him with schoolwork for the REST OF HIS LIFE. But then! Wait. Maybe my son has hope. After all, he is ONLY 9 months old and he has found his penis! Hooray for Gus! Great penis finder extraordinaire! Sign him up for AP Biology. He already has a head start! Every time that little rascal's diapers come off he grabs and tugs and squeezes and just generally enjoys his little anatomy. Perhaps he will be a doctor! Or a male stripper? Either way, I am sure now of his level of genius and have already selected his courses for high school, AP Biology being one of them.

My son will never be a male stripper, no matter how much he loves his own penis.

7 Comments:

Anonymous PF the elder said...

Oh, such things I have to look forward to with baby Luke . . . .

6:12 AM  
Anonymous Dan said...

Gus + peener = ba ha ha ha!

8:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

from amanda... oh, i don't know what i'll do if i ever have a baby boy... all sisters... not a penis in sight!! i don't think gus is special ed... he's perfect!

3:07 PM  
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