Back On the Scene. Really, I'm just bored.
A funny (I promise) insight into the world of being a wife, mom and teacher. Every day when I leave my job as a high school teacher, I think of all of the things my own precious son will never do when he is a teenager. I've decided to write it all down, just to make sure...
This is what happened today during bathtime. Usually I begin to fill up the tub and undress him while the water is running. Then I pick him up and put him in the bath. Not today. Today my son decided that he didn't need me to help him. Instead, he crawled into the bath on his own. I will admit, I was not in the room when that happened. Don't go calling the authorities, I do this ALL THE TIME (wow, that looks bad when you actually put it in writing). I don't know how he actually got in the bath, but I do know this: a) he was fully dressed, and b) his hair was not wet at all. So. It was a safe and effective way for him to get in the bathtub. Our bath routine will change beginning tomorrow. Mommy doesn't get to change out of her work clothes while the water is running.
Oh. You know you watched it. And since school is not back in session yet, and I am running low on dumb teenagers to make fun of, I will make fun of my boy Kevin Federline. First let me start by saying how embarrassed I was that in my own head I thought "You know, he's not half-bad looking." But then he had to go and open his damn mouth. I'm talking about the Teen Choice Awards people! You know, the show last night with the TWO WORST CO-HOSTS EVER (but that's for a different day). (OK. Maybe it's for now. But just real quick. How glad was Nick that he is not married to that dumb bimbo anymore? Could she have been any stupider? And Dane who? He sucked! I think he's a stand up comedian. Last night just put the nail in the coffin for him. What a loser!) Anyway, I watched mostly the whole show so as not to miss the debut of K-Fed. Within the first 4 words I realized that he REALLY IS Vanilla Ice! Seriously. I was having flashbacks of the 5th grade when Vanilla was kickin' it one time, boyeeeeee! Laugh if you will, but Federshit is gonna be big. Mark my words. I've seen it before with Vanilla. Every generation needs one, and these kids just got theirs. Congratulations, Kevin. My apologies.
I can't believe it's been 8 days since my last entry. Not that anyone reads. Not that anyone has been sitting on the edge of their seat. Not that my audience has been let down. But it's theraputic for me. I need it right now.
Or in. Whatever. The point is, I had a girls' night. Yip! With adults and wine and everything. And funny stories about teaching. FUNNY. Man, you haven't lived until you've been a kindergarten teacher and you have kids who declare "I speak horse." And then kids who are jealous of the horse whisperer and declare "I know what the ants in the ant farm are saying. I speak bug." That's some funny shit right there. Plus, the wine. Not pink, cheap, sweet low-class stuff. Real wine. That gets you a bit drunk. And sleepy. My husband just asked "Whatcha doin?" Nothing. Going to bed. I've hit the backspace key so much my pinky is about to fall off. Id i hadno't, ths post wpould all have olooke liek this and you woeuldn't have been abelt o read it.